Need advice on what to do

[Ralph]

Now this goes like this.
The local bird mob I am with have basically given me the cold shoulder.
While they will like most of the other people who post their photo's even while they are to a lesser quality.
I am not saying this about their shot as a jealousy thing it is just the facts of the matter

These are supposed to be friend and they are making it an unwelcome place to be.
While to me they are being so false with their comment to people with bad shots.
I have nothing against them in any way, I just at this moment don't know what to do.

Do I stay with them and put up with this or do I just walk away and cut my losses.
Thanks for any advice on this and it will all be thought of in what is said.

 

[Slug]

Find another bird mob.

 

[Ralph]

Find another bird mob.

I honestly think this is the way to go as well. Thank you for your quick response to this.

 

[Hank]

Life is too short to be wasting time with people you don't like mate. Cut your losses and move on. I've tended to steer away from organised photography groups as I find certain personality traits irritating and don't want to be bothered by them. Maybe it's me who has a problem but either way, I am happier doing my own thing and occasionally meeting up with someone on a casual basis or going on an organised shoot with Sony Scene.

 

[Ralph]

Life is too short to be wasting time with people you don't like mate. Cut your losses and move on. I've tended to steer away from organised photography groups as I find certain personality traits irritating and don't want to be bothered by them. Maybe it's me who has a problem but either way, I am happier doing my own thing and occasionally meeting up with someone on a casual basis or going on an organised shoot with Sony Scene.

Thanks for a straight up front answer and like what you have said and I am doing very much of my photography on my own now.
Now sooner that I do anything on that page it is ignored and I have wonder why do I waste my time with these people.

And on the traits of other there are a few there that really pi*& me off big time and I hate being around them.
And yes they more than likely feel the same way about me cause to am more of a say it as I see it which doesn't go down well these days.
This is one more step closer to the walk away as I think my time there is wasted.

So it is really looking like this is the right and the only move for me to make.
Thanks so much.

 

[Uncle Kevriano]

Exactly the reason I don't bother with groups like that. Jealousy and snobbery are rife usually, and I never understand the congratulating people on a bad shot. Criticise it, advise what they could do better, otherwise they will continue to shoot bad shots! Find something else, do your own thing. As Hank said. Life's too short.

 

[Ralph]

Exactly the reason I don't bother with groups like that. Jealousy and snobbery are rife usually, and I never understand the congratulating people on a bad shot. Criticise it, advise what they could do better, otherwise they will continue to shoot bad shots! Find something else, do your own thing. As Hank said. Life's too short.

With total respect for you I am going to do just what you have said. I have never seen you crunch words, so this along with all others have put me straight. It is time to walk away as it stands now I go out on my own.
I have no one to worry about or disappoint if I need to call it a day early cause of all my issues.
With the page I have had the trouble with as I think there is a loyalty thing but no one there is loyal to me.
Once this is posted I will go to that page and hit the leave page.
I will let you know if there is anyone send a message to ask why.
Thanks Mate and everyone else as well. And thanks for your support.

 

[Brownie]

I'm on board with all of this, but with one caveat: I think it's great if someone has one good friend they can share this hobby with. Perhaps there's someone in that group that stands out to you, one that you can have a good personal relationship with and bugger the rest. I'd like to have a photo buddy to do walks, outings etc.

Ultimately though it's best to leave the baggage behind. @Hank took the words right out of my mouth: "Life's too short."

 

[Ralph]

I'm on board with all of this, but with one caveat: I think it's great if someone has one good friend they can share this hobby with. Perhaps there's someone in that group that stands out to you, one that you can have a good personal relationship with and bugger the rest. I'd like to have a photo buddy to do walks, outings etc.

Ultimately though it's best to leave the baggage behind. @Hank took the words right out of my mouth: "Life's too short."

Brownie I fully agree on what you have said. I do have an old fella who I go out with on a regular basis but his camera is in getting fixed at the moment.
But as it is with me I have got back problems and a heap of arthritis and I might start out strong but an hour later I am in so much pain I have to call it a day as I just can't keep going. When I am with people I fell obligated to stay out far past where I should be. Just so they get there full day out.
The next few days are hell for me pain wise, lucky I have a few photo's to play with to keep me busy.
My old mate he has sort of seen it all and is the most understanding and is ready to go at the drop of a hat and I will continue with going out with him, though he is a popular old fella as he is out most day with other people and I don't know where he gets his energy from. But he does it anyway.

So there are times when the other people I did go out with, both just walk off and do his own thing and you are pretty much out there on your own anyway. So I stopped asking them, as I wasn't just going to be a free ride for them in the long run.

But I don't mind now going out on my own. Like I think I said before if I have to call it a day early I am not disappointing anyone. I know I wouldn't like it if I was fully able bodied and have to head back home only an hour or 2 into the days outing. And it is better for me to do it this way for the reason said.

So walking away is what I thought was the right thing to do but I think I just needed a little more insight to it. Which thankfully I go here and I did go to the page and close myself out of it once I post off the reply. And now it's done I feel no regret but like a lot of weight has been lifted.

And thanks Brownie on your thoughts of still having a Photomate as it is a great thought.

 

[roxannebcb]

What is wrong with people? Groups are just never good. Find a like minded fellow. I swear I think some people join groups just to be judgemental and snobby. Ridiculous.

 

[Brownie]

I almost joined a group in my area about 3 years ago. It looks like COVID shut them down, not sure if it's permanent.

I attended one of their meetings to check them out. There were two reasons I didn't join:

A) They had typical monthly contests, which were were ok, but the rules said all entries MUST be printed and matted. Nope, thanks. Get a stinkin' TV and someone's laptop and come into the 21st century. The last thing I need is a stack of printed photos hanging around the house. 3 contest/month X 3 entries per contest = 9 photos/month, x 12.

B) Most of the members that were there had no photographic experience, it was just something for them to do. That ok, it's great to learn new things. It wasn't an issue until it came time to vote. One of the members (who obviously knew his way around a camera) had made a beautiful shot of a bird on a stump, very well composed and exposed, really excellent shot. It lost to a very poorly done shot of someone's granddaughter because she was cute.

I could just see myself sitting there month after month, biting my lip and wanting to scream. I thought it better to stay independent.

 

[Ralph]

What is wrong with people? Groups are just never good. Find a like minded fellow. I swear I think some people join groups just to be judgemental and snobby. Ridiculous.

Roxanne I like what you have got to say and I am thinking of putting a post on my own facebook page and try to word it right to find the right person who I can go out with. I know the old fella I do go out with once a week if I am lucky is a good one as he knows the area far better than me. And has taken me to some places I have never been to. Well I actually take him as I have the 4x4 but I also enjoy his company.
Your last part struck a cord with me as this is what it is completely judgemental and full of snobbery. On outing's people have come up to me and said wow some of your shots are so good but never act on it though so these and just words to get them by as I see it. Thanks for you comments also.

I almost joined a group in my area about 3 years ago. It looks like COVID shut them down, not sure if it's permanent.

I attended one of their meetings to check them out. There were two reasons I didn't join:

A) They had typical monthly contests, which were were ok, but the rules said all entries MUST be printed and matted. Nope, thanks. Get a stinkin' TV and someone's laptop and come into the 21st century. The last thing I need is a stack of printed photos hanging around the house. 3 contest/month X 3 entries per contest = 9 photos/month, x 12.

B) Most of the members that were there had no photographic experience, it was just something for them to do. That ok, it's great to learn new things. It wasn't an issue until it came time to vote. One of the members (who obviously knew his way around a camera) had made a beautiful shot of a bird on a stump, very well composed and exposed, really excellent shot. It lost to a very poorly done shot of someone's granddaughter because she was cute.

I could just see myself sitting there month after month, biting my lip and wanting to scream. I thought it better to stay independent.

Brownie maybe Covid saved you. I can say I have never been in a group setting like that what you mentioned. But I would say I would be of the same mind as you with it to.
Your comment on the competition where the cute kids wins over the best shot of the comp is just stupid as I see it. I did an test with the group I was in and this one person posted up a flat looking shot of one of our local birds. As in flat it was or looked straight out of the camera and it should have been processed a little to bring life into the feathers and colour more so.
I posted my image of the same breed of bird and it was looking like it was ready to fly off the screen (In my opinion this is), but it had life to it and the eyes were so bright and alive looking. It got looked at 3 times over the center of attraction on the pages shot which got well over 40 anything over 15 there is a hard thing to do. I think this is where I knew I was on the outer.
And over all over the past year the whole page changed to my disliking and I am now happy away from there. Thanks again mate.

 

[Clix Pix]

With regard to shooting with a group..... I have shot with groups in the past and while I did learn from others' experience, I realized that I am much, much happier on my own because when I'm with a group there are too many distractions, people chatting, etc., and then just about the time I am really getting into the "zone," everybody else decides to pack up and move to the next site.... GRRR!

Even shooting with just one other person I find can be a bit distracting if we get to gabbing about this-and-that and not being mindful of why we're in the photo location in the first place. And, yes, when I get tired or feel I need to sit down for a bit if I'm with someone else I hesitate to say this or do it, and that's not good. On my own, I can go at my own pace and spend as much time as I need or want in any particular spot and then when I feel the need to take a break, it's easy to just look around for a place to sit for a spell and do so, no one else to please....

 

[Ralph]

With regard to shooting with a group..... I have shot with groups in the past and while I did learn from others' experience, I realized that I am much, much happier on my own because when I'm with a group there are too many distractions, people chatting, etc., and then just about the time I am really getting into the "zone," everybody else decides to pack up and move to the next site.... GRRR!

Even shooting with just one other person I find can be a bit distracting if we get to gabbing about this-and-that and not being mindful of why we're in the photo location in the first place. And, yes, when I get tired or feel I need to sit down for a bit if I'm with someone else I hesitate to say this or do it, and that's not good. On my own, I can go at my own pace and spend as much time as I need or want in any particular spot and then when I feel the need to take a break, it's easy to just look around for a place to sit for a spell and do so, no one else to please....

This is the exact same way I see it and feel it. You are talking the way I am doing it and the way I have done it.
It has stuck accord with me as I know what you are saying fully.
I will say the rest side is a must for me now, but with a group you feel obligated to pick yourself up and move along.
This I will not miss, as for many of the people in the group I will not miss either.

My last outing on my own I got a real hard bird to get in our area. One comment basically said I have been at this for over 30 years and have only heard them but you are fresh to it (7 years or so now) and you have got it 2 times. This is so unfair and not right. The head of the page called me a tin-arse which here this means that I am far too lucky, as if I didn't deserve to get the bird. I just smiled to myself.
Thanks for yet another great lot of comments.

 

[Brownie]

As this conversation continues, I would point out that it doesn't have to be all or nothing. People who prefer to shoot on their own can still enjoy the camaraderie of others once in a while, like on special outings. Don't set hard rules, go with the flow. If the opportunity to do something different comes with the price tag of dealing with a group a few times a year, is that really so bad?

 

[Clix Pix]

I agree with that, Tim, and if an opportunity comes along and I am invited to join a group or a few fellow photographers for an excursion to a unique place, I wouldn't turn that down! I do enjoy the camaraderie, too, from time to time. Sometimes in the past some of us in the DC area have gotten together in the spring to go shoot the cherry blossoms at the Tidal Basin, and that was always fun. One year I went down there with a bunch of fellow photographers that I knew from earlier shooting trips, and then went back to the Tidal Basin on my own the following day or two, so had the best of both worlds. The last several years, though, either weather was an issue or of course the lockdown and pandemic, too, so I don't know if anyone will propose one of those excursions this spring or not.

 

[Ralph]

As this conversation continues, I would point out that it doesn't have to be all or nothing. People who prefer to shoot on their own can still enjoy the camaraderie of others once in a while, like on special outings. Don't set hard rules, go with the flow. If the opportunity to do something different comes with the price tag of dealing with a group a few times a year, is that really so bad?

Tim I agree with you to a point. This point being that I do and I have been out with a few of them outside of the group setting's, But only to find that I am so handy to have around as I have the 4x4 to get to places their cars can't get to. And once we are out it is them doing their own thing. I think for us here with so many snakes about it is better to stay in eye sight of one another for security reasons.
One I use to take out a lot and got told by this person how and what they think of other members only to see this same person all smile with them out in the group outing's. So for me the group outing's with this person there just rubs me the wrong way. I will never say what they have said about others, but to me it is so two faced and goes against the way I think and act. So I have got one old fella from the group who I will do anything for as he is a genuine bloke and thinks quite a lot along the same ways as I do. And he use to run the group as well.
So with this group I would say not a chance in anything to I want to be around them, when all you are is really a friend who is useful for one thing and then forget about you until they need you again. Not for me.

I agree with that, Tim, and if an opportunity comes along and I am invited to join a group or a few fellow photographers for an excursion to a unique place, I wouldn't turn that down! I do enjoy the camaraderie, too, from time to time. Sometimes in the past some of us in the DC area have gotten together in the spring to go shoot the cherry blossoms at the Tidal Basin, and that was always fun. One year I went down there with a bunch of fellow photographers that I knew from earlier shooting trips, and then went back to the Tidal Basin on my own the following day or two, so had the best of both worlds. The last several years, though, either weather was an issue or of course the lockdown and pandemic, too, so I don't know if anyone will propose one of those excursions this spring or not.

Clix Pix if the chance came to go out with others in the group who I know to a good degree I would go with them, but it would be selective few who I would chose out of them. I would love a chance to go to a new place and meet up with new people with the same interest and go to a place with our camera's and do as you said. So I would never rule this out.

 

[Brownie]

Tim I agree with you to a point. This point being that I do and I have been out with a few of them outside of the group setting's, But only to find that I am so handy to have around as I have the 4x4 to get to places their cars can't get to. And once we are out it is them doing their own thing. I think for us here with so many snakes about it is better to stay in eye sight of one another for security reasons.
One I use to take out a lot and got told by this person how and what they think of other members only to see this same person all smile with them out in the group outing's. So for me the group outing's with this person there just rubs me the wrong way. I will never say what they have said about others, but to me it is so two faced and goes against the way I think and act. So I have got one old fella from the group who I will do anything for as he is a genuine bloke and thinks quite a lot along the same ways as I do. And he use to run the group as well.
So with this group I would say not a chance in anything to I want to be around them, when all you are is really a friend who is useful for one thing and then forget about you until they need you again. Not for me.

Clix Pix if the chance came to go out with others in the group who I know to a good degree I would go with them, but it would be selective few who I would chose out of them. I would love a chance to go to a new place and meet up with new people with the same interest and go to a place with our camera's and do as you said. So I would never rule this out.

Right, all well and good. But I wasn't thinking so much about those clowns. There are other people in the world, our challenge is to get out and meet them!

 

[Ralph]

Right, all well and good. But I wasn't thinking so much about those clowns. There are other people in the world, our challenge is to get out and meet them!

I have no problems with go out to meet others and getting out with them in anyway. I think I might have mentioned it that I would be okay with meeting other people and doing that. Plus with new people you would get a fresh way in some cases on what to do as well I think. So if that happens I would jump at this chance.
I would even pay to go out on a camping/photography trip as this would be a great way to meet up with fresh idea's.

 

[Brownie]

I have no problems with go out to meet others and getting out with them in anyway. I think I might have mentioned it that I would be okay with meeting other people and doing that. Plus with new people you would get a fresh way in some cases on what to do as well I think. So if that happens I would jump at this chance.
I would even pay to go out on a camping/photography trip as this would be a great way to meet up with fresh idea's.

I've thought about doing a guided photo trip, but holy cow that's expensive!

 

[Ralph]

I've thought about doing a guided photo trip, but holy cow that's expensive!

We have got a couple of mobs up my way of where I live in the Northwest of Victoria. One is just about 110 kilometers south of home and it cost $190 for the day out. But my thoughts are these people know the area and can get you to birds you might be looking for over the years. But they get them on that paid outing. So I do think it is a worthwhile thing to do. I did it with this one fella and I got the Mallee Fowl and I was so happy as he had set up a make shift hide and it was on 2 or 3 meters from their nest and I got shots of them working the nest and heaps of shots. For me that paid for it right then and there and I get a few other birds I had been after with him. There is another one or 2 and I will make plan to go out with them in the near future, for the same reasons.

 

[Hank]

I would even pay to go out on a camping/photography trip as this would be a great way to meet up with fresh idea's.

Aussie check out Sony Scene ANZ
Covid pretty much shut the events down for the last year or so but they are slowly starting back up again. Of course it depends what area of Victoria you are in and your willingness to travel, but they have events all around Australia and New Zealand. Some are inexpensive, some are more expensive and they cross a few genres. I attended a Portrait Shoot one in Parramatta with a group which I think was about $50 for about 2-3 hours. The price covered a model and a pro photographer who ran the event. As it was done in conjunction with the Parramatta Sony Store, they offered loans of lenses to try and discounts should you want to buy. I will definitely do another one. I might upload a photo or two from that night.

 

[Ralph]

Aussie check out Sony Scene ANZ
Covid pretty much shut the events down for the last year or so but they are slowly starting back up again. Of course it depends what area of Victoria you are in and your willingness to travel, but they have events all around Australia and New Zealand. Some are inexpensive, some are more expensive and they cross a few genres. I attended a Portrait Shoot one in Parramatta with a group which I think was about $50 for about 2-3 hours. The price covered a model and a pro photographer who ran the event. As it was done in conjunction with the Parramatta Sony Store, they offered loans of lenses to try and discounts should you want to buy. I will definitely do another one. I might upload a photo or two from that night.

Like the idea of it but honestly I am more interested in bird and wildlife photography over people, (which I suck at by the way).
If as say I want to do people I would get my grandkids. But if it was as I mentioned I certainly would look at it.
What I did like what you put down was the loans of lenses and discount if you like to buy one.
But all this said I think all doors should remain open as who knows one day I might want to go down that path way and it has given me things to think about.